My hydrangeas are coming up, my roses have some green on them, and my lilac has buds. And I have plans to go to the big box garden center and pull some weeds this weekend. I think spring’s almost here, y’all.
This week’s links are all about the idea of body positivity, consent within relationships, the media, and a few other things besides.
- These two essays really spoke to me, because they are both things I’ve experienced, albeit not recently.
- “I’m body positive as long as you’re not obese.” This is a thing people actually say. Don’t say this, like, ever–but especially not when you’re with a fat person.
- “I also had a feeling of such difference, of finding myself out of the category of a casual interaction and into the category of—what?—a problem.” So many feelings about this.
- “I’m not interested in pronouncing on the naming question; what I’m trying to describe is a tortured space in which some women end up lying about their own desires in order to sanitize a story that would otherwise look oppressive or even abusive. You must say you want it in order not to be judged for accepting it.” One of the best essays I’ve ever read about the Fifty Shades trilogy. Seriously. It’s fantastic.
- And another great essay about media from Lili Loofbourow: The Male Glance. This one’s pretty dense, but well worth your time.
- I am about the same age as Monica Lewinsky–I think I may be a year younger than she is. The whole thing in the 90s–it seemed so awful that she was treated so badly not only by the media, but by pretty much everyone else in her life. Bill Clinton gets to move on with his life, while Monica is perpetually caught by her past.
- We’ve always hated girls online I was having flashbacks to my Diaryland days reading this (I just checked, my login still works! woo!)
- Let’s end this on a slightly more positive note: What if we just decided we’re doing a good job?