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Pretty Terrible

Pop Culture Criticism by Natalie Luhrs

December 11, 2015

Bad Life Decisions: Mary Robinette Kowal Reads Theodore Beale. Sexily.

Doof Warrior

As promised at the conclusion of the fundraiser, here is Mary Robinette Kowal reading snippets from Theodore Beale’s Eternal Warriors™: War In Heaven in a very, very sexy voice.

 

But wait! There’s more! Could this possibly be a DANCE REMIX? I dare say that this is as fine a piece of music as anything theat Psychosonik ever released.

 

As for the other two books I was going to read, I have a confession to make: I don’t know if that’s going to happen and I feel terrible about it but here’s why: I started reading the second book and taking notes and it rapidly became clear that the plot of the second book was going to involve a school shooting and I just couldn’t find it in myself to even try to find anything funny about it.

I hope y’all understand.

As for comments–any trollish bullshit may end up recorded as phone sex. Just saying.

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Filed Under: Bad Life Decisions Natalie Luhrs

About Natalie Luhrs

I'm a lifelong geek with a passion for books and social justice.

Reader Interactions

Links: 12/11/15
Links: 12/18/15

Comments

  1. Steve says

    December 11, 2015 at 2:05 pm

    That was awesomely horrible. As a reminder for anyone else who (like me…) didn’t donate yet, RAINN is the charity for this effort.

  2. Jeremy Brett says

    December 11, 2015 at 3:26 pm

    Bravo on posting this. It was an inspired idea. 🙂

  3. dkscully says

    December 11, 2015 at 4:04 pm

    This is too, too wonderful.

  4. redheadedfemme says

    December 11, 2015 at 9:51 pm

    OH DEAR DEITY.

    Can I nominate this for Best Related Work?? 😀

    • Natalie Luhrs says

      December 11, 2015 at 9:53 pm

      I’ll just point out that the entire project is eligible in that category.

  5. Mary Robinette Kowal says

    December 12, 2015 at 12:10 am

    I’ll also just point out that, in the case of performed work, the writer would get the nomination for Best Related Work.

    • redheadedfemme says

      December 12, 2015 at 9:53 am

      @Mary

      Whoops. Forget that, then. I’ll just content myself with saying that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in ages. Bravo.

  6. Consumer Unit 5012 says

    December 12, 2015 at 4:09 am

    I just spent an hour or two reading through the entire Bad Life Decision. You poor, poor person. But I salute your suffering for our amusement, because it’s vastly more entertaining than this dog-egg of a book would be to read.

    This whole story reads like something a Chuunibyou would write in his notebook when he should be paying attention in Algebra class. (Which would certainly explain the slapdash worldbuilding, unrestrained power-tripping, and bizarre theology.)

    I’m deeply disappointed that neither of the sisters yelled “I’M TELLING MOM!” at our dipstick main character, but I’m pretty sure that would require more humor than Beale possesses or could cope with in his Very Serious Story.

  7. NelC says

    December 14, 2015 at 1:59 am

    Wouldn’t it be funny, though, if the closest Beale ever got to winning a Hugo was getting fifth place for a spoof reading of his book?

  8. little Alex says

    December 14, 2015 at 12:30 pm

    Oh, good Lord, that was more hilarious than I know how to describe. I was laughing so hard. And a little turned on. Guiltily so.

Trackbacks

  1. Amazing Stories | AMAZING NEWS: 12/13/15 - 'in this theater that I call my soul, I always play the starring role'* - Amazing Stories says:
    December 13, 2015 at 11:07 am

    […] Sexy Beale Reading by Kowal (kleenex only needed to mop up the tears from laughter) […]

  2. Pixel Scroll 12/14 The Trixels Scroll | File 770 says:
    December 15, 2015 at 12:05 am

    […] Beale novel, and unlock another major incentive. And now that incentive has arrived — “Bad Life Decisions: Mary Robinette Kowal Reads Theodore Beale. Sexily” — at Pretty […]

  3. Home Just in Time for Xmas Eve | Neither Here nor There.... says:
    December 15, 2015 at 1:41 pm

    […] Tweet of the Day: Bad Life Decisions: Mary Robinette Kowal Reads Theodore Beale. Sexily. […]

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Hello! I’m Natalie Luhrs. I write about books and culture and whatever else strikes my fancy. I have so many opinions.

I was a nominee for the Best Fan Writer Hugo in 2017.

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